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cooperative and eager to please everyone was. like little children, in a way. Normally they don't seem to
value life the same way we do, perhaps it's the heat? But people are sentimental about the nobility, if you
can call them that. The queen, who is the sectoolar, sekyouler? Non-religious, anyway, ruler, because
she obviously got married and had children, which our Sarge found helpful, anyway, she was particularly
anxious to please once the sergeant began chatting up the little crown princess.
Sarge said her former majesty couldn't talk fast enough, actually. Says she told him the temple is actually
inside the mountains, in this great maze of caves the mountains here being made of some unsuitable
porous rock. She said we'd never find it because it was miles and miles away and the jungle was full of
man-eating animals and the aforementioned asps and large toothy reptiles and such. He pointed out to
her former majesty very reasonably, he said, that there surely must be a nice path back there, since itisthe
seat of their religion and they must go out that way for ceremonies and such and she said, no, that the
temple virgins periodically come into the city to bless everyone and that otherwise they seclude
themselves and do sacred stuff, like making sacrifices and polishing collection bowls and guarding the
Sacred Assets and such. This generally keeps them busy enough to keep them from being seen by men.
When we troops talked it over among ourselves after Sarge told us this, we figured they had to be kept
away from the lads because they were very beautiful and unlikely to remain qualified for their jobs as
temple virgins if they got out much.
Well, we're just mopping up on the raping, killing, looting and pillaging now. We are rather undermanned
to hold the city, such as it is. A shame we had to do the looting before we make the trek to the temple.
Now we have to carry it all with us, as there is no one here to guard it. No place really, once we finished
using the cannon on all those buildings. They were rather flimsy things, with spires and curlicues and onion
domes and such, and fell apart immediately. Hard to imagine it ever amounting to anything, now, though it
looked ever so grand and full of itself when we first arrived.
Must rush now. Time to put one foot in front of the other, as it were. I'm glad I mostly got a bit of
jewelry for you and Sarah and Gisela. A few loose gems to turn a profit on, maybe. Pried 'em out of the
eyes of the heathen idols. Things were thick with these jewels and not just the eyes, if you know what I
mean. Lucky for me that A goddess likes her baubles. They'll be lighter to carry than what some of the
other fellows have. Sarge was just dying to bring a lot of the tools he found in the dungeon. Said he
wanted to speak to the temple virgins and do a bit of anthropological study on the local religion with the
aim of discrediting it and converting the populace. Religious fellow, our Sarge. He brought along her
former Majesty, thinking she might enjoy the pilgrimage, though she's a bit long in the tooth and rather too
tattered from the initial persuasive tactics of our Sarge to be of much interest to the lads at the moment.
But Captain Burden said that ours is not the first invasion force of our folk to come down and decimate
the capital city. Sid Smythers, who is a curious one, raised his hand and wanted to know if we weren't
the first, how did we know there would still be virgins and Sacred Assets left. Captain said we didn't,
exactly, but after the reports came home that the troops had taken the city and were on their way to the
sinister temple, the invasion forces inconveniently disappearedcompletelyandforeverinto the unknown. He
says at least fifteen other attempts have been made and not one man has ever returned. Just so you'll
understand if you don't hear from me very often for awhile.
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From Deep in the Jungle
Night Watch
Dear Mum,
Hi? How are you doing? I am fine though hot and wet and have a bit of foot rot from walking on the
squishy jungle floor. I wouldn't want to worry you, but I must say that there is something very strange
indeed about this jungle. This afternoon Corporal Peabody was eaten by a very pretty flower and
Symington lost half his right hand and the fingers to the first knuckles on the left trying to drag poor
Peabody, who was making an awful ruckus, out of the blasted posy. Swinborn had to speak quite
harshly to the old queen about failing to warn us of this particular danger. He said the next time something
of the sort happened, he would see to it that she came out no better than the lad caught unawares by the
indigenous flora, as the brothers at our school would call it.
The queen apologized, weeping with sincerity and also because of her split lip, and said that the flower
was not known to her but must be one of the magical traps laid by the temple guardians along the trail.
As they changed from time to time, she could hardly be held responsible, could she? Sarge growled but
don't worry, Mum. I know how tender hearted you are but, actually, it's unlikely he'll feed the queen to
the blossom because we do rather need her to guide the way. He's got a collar fixed round her neck and
a bit of rope to pull her back in if she looks like she's going too far into the jungle. I must say, Mum, these
people have their pride. She wears the bloody thing as if it was made of diamonds and golden chain.
LATER
Well, that was rather interesting. I was just sitting here writing to you when the queen drags herself over
and says to me, in quite the sort of cute accent these people have because they can't speak properly like
we can. "So, you are mercenary, yes?"
"Oh no. No indeed," I said. "I am a patriot, fighting for er you know? King. Country. The right way
of life and all that."
She gave a sigh every bit as great as the one you do when Sister soiled the frock you'd spent all day
washing and ironing. In fact, under the old shiner she'd got back in the city and the newly split lip, now
that I saw her close up, she looked not too different from Mrs. Benshoof down the block. You know,
dark and exotic and yet as common as anything, in a regal sort of way, of course. But not a bit
hoity-toity, as you might think.
I mean, there she was, a queen, talking to me as if we were on guard duty together. I hadn't seen her
close up or heard her speak until then. Well, you could tell she was a fine educated lady by how she
knew our language, couldn't you? Even if it was a little hard to understand her. I wondered if I ought to
bow or something. She didn't seem to care one way or the other, so I skipped it.
"What is that you're working on?" she asked in a chatty fashion.
"Just a letter to me Mum," I told her. Well, of course she was the enemy and all that but it wasn't as if I
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was telling her how many reinforcements we were expecting or which men were our best marksmen.
"You have a mother?" she asked, sounding surprised.
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